Nights like tonight make me wish I had the courage and the ability to put Mabel out of my misery. I don't ask for much and I do everything I can. I have re-arranged my kitchen to make everything convenient. Her meals are either Banquet or totally put together frozen dinners from scratch. I have bought her a heater, a shelf unit, new dishes and a bread box to store them in. I clean her room and the rest of the house and provide her meals.
Tonight I went out to my friend Melissa's house. At 11:10p Mabel leaves me a message on my phone; where am I , the dog is looking for me. "Well, I got my water....". But that is not enough she has to make sure to embarrass me in front of everyone and make me feel like shit so she calls again and this time I answer. She is all whiny and says again that the dog is looking for me. My friends feel sorry for me, the mood is totally ruined. Truthfully even before she called I knew she would, it is just my life these days. Every morning that I hear her moving around in there is the start of another day of bondage for me. I am becoming a prisoner in my own my home.
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